My Top 10 Professional Resolutions for 2014

Here we are, hours away from 2014.

And right about now, plenty of people are thinking about resolving to make changes (presumably for the better) in their lives.

Since I'm doing a lot of introspective thinking about my career, I thought this year I’d make a list of things I’d like to change or do differently in 2014 as it relates to my professional life.

Initially, it was a long list. I whittled it down to items that, for me, will hopefully result in greater satisfaction or sense of accomplishment.

Some are about getting more organized. A few have to do with the way technology has altered my life. Others involve strengthening relationships. And some are simply things I would like to do better, or more often.

What do you want to change in 2014? Please feel free add your own 2014 “professional” resolutions.

My Top 10 Professional Resolutions for 2014

10. Break out of email jail.

It’s time I heeded the advice of countless time management professionals. I need to get back to using email as a tool. Practically speaking, this means closing my email client and only checking it at specific intervals throughout the day. After all, if a matter is that urgent, I should get a call, not an email.

My success will depend on reducing self-inflicted email – by lowering the frequency (or turning off) email notifications and alerts, plus culling newsletter subscriptions down to only those I read religiously.

9. Drop the phone.

I am a mobile phone addict. Any free moment I have, I’m checking email and text messages, stocks, weather, and social media channels – even playing a few Words with Friends games. I know it’s annoying to those around me and can even be a dangerous distraction.

Most of all, I believe my idle time could be better used. As idle time. I don’t know about you, but it seems the minute I let my mind wander, great ideas come to light.

8. Delete time-sucking apps/games.

If I'm vowing to stop fiddling with my phone every waking moment, then I probably should delete some of those non-essential apps/games that are begging me to open them up.

7. Develop a more disciplined approach to consuming content.

I'm suffering from content over-load. My "articles to read later" file is bursting at the seam (metaphorically speaking of course, since I'm sure it can hold much more than I'd ever be able to save/bookmark).

It's time to develop a system to prioritize the inflow and then systematically catch up on content I'm definitely interested in reading/viewing.

6. Develop a more disciplined approach to creating content.

If I wean myself from my inbox and schedule time to read relevant content, it will free up some serious time for my “real” work. My underlying goal here is to get in the habit of writing on a more disciplined and scheduled basis.

As an added benefit, if I can lessen the number of times I am racing to finish a presentation or write a critically important document, I am sure it will have nothing but a positive impact on the quality and quantity of my work.

5. Filter out the non-essential.

Wouldn't it be great to have a pair of glasses that would only allow us to see the things that really mattered? Not the proverbial rose-colored ones, but more like a pair equipped with a yellow highlighter?

As already noted, I need to be more discerning when it comes to how I spend my time. That means skipping meetings where I’m invited as a nicety rather than necessity, resist raising my hand every the time there is a call for volunteers, more rapidly recognizing when something is a lost cause and it’s time to move on, and so on. By cutting out the extraneous, what’s important will probably shine so bright I’ll be reaching for sunglasses instead.

4. Find the time to lend a hand.

In what might seem contradictory to my previous comment about not volunteering at every opportunity, I do want to help or assist colleagues more often. Not that I haven’t in the past, but connecting with or providing support to my professional friends sometimes gets relegated to the bottom of my to-do list.

A meaningful introduction, constructive suggestion, word of encouragement or sending a hand-written note of appreciation goes a long way to show people you value that your relationship with them matters.

3. Teach.

When I was about 10 years old, I wanted to become a teacher. My parents salvaged some old desks being thrown out by a local school and I quickly set about creating a classroom in our basement for my younger siblings and kids from our neighborhood. Convincing them to “play school” after school or on a Saturday wasn’t always a popular idea, but it forced me to find ways to make education fun and engaging.

Whenever I’ve been able to be an instructor, coach or mentor into my life, it has provided me with a great deal of personal satisfaction – plus the added benefit of giving back to the individual, community or company at large.

2. Talk less. Listen more.

I have quite a bit of Italian blood coursing through my veins, and apparently the gift of gab and gesturing while speaking goes along with that part of my heritage (at least in my family). While I love telling stories to illustrate a point, I need to keep it short and concise. And occasionally sit on my hands.

Being a good listener is an essential part of being a good manager, co-worker, employee, friend, spouse or parent. Yet there are times I could listen more deeply, stifle the impulse to express my opinions or recognize that a response is not always required.

1. Learn something new every day.

“Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.” - Nelson Mandela

Given the amount of information that swirls around us each and every day, coming across something I did not already know is not that difficult. So what I am really after is finding or observing something will spark my curiosity and imagination. Entice me want to learn more. Ask questions. Challenge the consensus. Formulate my own opinions.

As my greatest passion is idea generation (and problem-solving), constantly learning is an occupational must and something I need to keep in front of me every day.

I would like to wish everyone a happy, and professionally satisfying, New Year. Cheers!

Trusting Your Gut

In our life's journey, we get to a point where we need to make an important decision that involves two or more potential choices. 

Typically, each option is a viable one, but each one presents positive and negative ramifications. 

How do we decide which is the best option to pick? The right path to take?

There are scores of books, articles, flow charts, processes and people ready to give an answer to that question. Interestingly enough, just like the complexity facing the decision-maker, the solution providers offer just as many choices further exasperating the task at hand.

But it seems to me that the most important driver in these important decisions tends to be a non-scientific, unjustifiable, indescribable one. Well, there is one universal term I'm aware of for it....

Your gut.

We all have had that experience. That moment when something just feels right. We are filled with a sudden sense of calm. Sereneness. A small smile may emerge or even a gentle nodding of our heads.  We might even think to ourselves - ah yes, this all makes sense now.

Sometimes it's not what we logically anticipated as the right answer at all. It might even be the polar opposite. Or an option not seriously considered or maybe one not even thought of in the first place. It may be just acknowledging that what we felt was the best option really is the best, but perhaps reconciling it will be the toughest to implement. The more difficult road versus the path of least resistance. Or visa-versa.

Of course then the question becomes - how is our gut formed and should we trust it? On this, there are scores of opinions too. 

Here's mine: our "gut" is a combination of two things - logic and intuition. Our gut is the beautiful swirling together of these aspects of our human-ness as they reconcile the struggle to unify and agree to a final decision.  

Our logical side wants the decision to be bullet-proof in it's selection rationale. This is fed by a tremendous amount of external input - our own life experiences, opinions of others, facts, data and trends that may be overlaid, intertwined and pulled apart to systematically review each option and winnow away the inferior option. Leaving just the best for last.

Our intuition wants us to solely rely on the intangibles to make the decision. Feelings and emotions. And how we "read" the feelings and emotions of others as they react to the various choices. Past experiences also come into play - but often recalling the emotional connection tied to those past decisions - not necessarily the resulting outcomes.

In the end, all this information stops swirling and comes to rest. Whether in a quiet moment or while walking among thousands on a busy city street, the decision, and realization we have made the decision, just seems to hit us in the pit of our stomach. Our gut has spoken.

Should we trust our gut? I believe so. We have read countless stories of times where individuals have made a decision despite being adamantly urged or pressured to select or choose something to the contrary. When they are proven right, the words, "it just felt like the right thing to do at the time" seem to magically appear over and over.

Can our gut be wrong? Of course. But I believe that the vast majority of times we can sense the right path to take, decision to make, future to pursue, if we dim the chorus of complexity and listen closely to what our simplistic inner-self is trying to say.

Photo By Mitya Ilyinov (originally posted to Flickr as crossroads) [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

My soft, snugly bathrobe

Today's musing surrounds a simple fact: I stayed in my bathrobe all day.

It wasn't rainy. It wasn't cold (actually it was unseasonably warm and sunny here). I wasn't sick. I wasn't waiting for something to finish in the dryer.

I just didn't feel like getting out of the one piece of clothing I own that I find most comfortable. And comforting.

My soft, snugly bathrobe was a gift from my kids (my daughter picked it out) a few years ago. A plush, mid-calf length white spa-quality robe. It is the softest robe I've ever owned.

But back to the why.... I had all sorts of plans for the day mapped out in my head. Get some holiday shopping done. A few other small errands. Even thought I was going to get in a run. None of which happened.

I didn't even do anything of real substance inside the house either. Didn't get to tackle re-organizing a closet or clearing out an over-stuffed drawer. No cleaning of any real sort - didn't even make the bed. No cooking other than reheating some pasta for lunch.

So what the hell happened to me? In pondering why I just couldn't seem to muster the energy to do anything productive today, it occurred to me that my mind and body were completely in sync with each other and were no-so subtly trying to tell me something all week.

Rest.

For anyone that knows me, they know that I am rarely ever at rest. And when not doing something, I'm planning to do something. Even when I am quietly sitting at a keyboard, my mind is racing to infinity and beyond. Some describe me as having a touch of ADD. I'm just one of those "go-go-go"people versus the "laid back" kind.

And no matter which side of that spectrum you fall on - I can attest that crossing over to the other side every now and again is well worth the trip.  It's not that one side is better or worse than the other, but like all things in life, finding a balance can be extremely rewarding on many levels.

For me, puttering around the house, looking out the window at the beautiful foliage, catching up by actually talking (not texting!) with a friend, petting my cat and doing a bit of personal writing was completely fulfilling and restful day for me.

All in my soft, snugly bathrobe.

I See Weirdly Dressed People Everyday

I fell in love with NYC a long time ago and still enjoy coming here every day*.

The desire to work in NYC is something that was probably set into motion during my childhood.

My dad used to take me to work with him on a few occasions when I was younger and I just loved it. Initially, it was likely because the secretary pool thought I was cute and allowed me to pretend I was working and use one of their fancy electric typewriters.

As I got older, the trips turned into short forays into the exciting world of "The City". I was joined by the twin daughters of one of my dad's colleagues from Long Island.  Armed with nothing more than a subway map and a bunch of tokens, we'd head out for some shopping and adventure. Bloomingdales almost always was on the list of places to go and lots of other stops in between the 2 Broadway office and mid-town. We had no cell phones and probably didn't even have the number of our dads' office. All that was expected of us was to not to go above 59th Street and be back by a certain time to start the commute home.

Those trips were tons of fun and the thrill of exploring and people watching was forever seared into my brain. Although I consider myself a veteran city worker, part of me just loves the energy and vibrancy in NYC.  I believe it is like no other place on earth.

And sometimes I can't help and stop and stare at the often bizarre things that seem to be a "natural" part of NYC. Especially people dressed weirdly. Very weirdly. As in stuff you probably would only see at Halloween anywhere else.

Now, more often than not there is a logical reason for these costumes (promotions for a show or event), but it still makes me laugh inside.

Of course some of the get-ups are just people being weird too. Or somehow thinking that what they have on their backs is in some twisted way a unique fashion statement.

Since starting this blog, I decided to try and snap pictures of some of these sightings. Here's a few taken in the span of two days on my short walk to Penn Station.  I wasn't fast enough to catch a few others - there was a woman walking with what appeared to be a grey shag rug with a whole cut out for her neck. Hopefully she'll be around tomorrow....

I <3 NYC.

*Disclaimer: Days that the transit systems are mucked up are rightfully excluded.

What makes life worth living?

Today I learned that someone I know tried to kill themselves. Commit suicide. Die.

They did not succeed.

I'm left with an difficult range of emotions and reality to comprehend.  Disbelieve. Denial. Wanting to pretend it didn't happen.

Then the grief sets in. What if they had succeeded. Will they try again? Why did I not see this coming? What could I have done to prevent this?

What does it take in us as humans to drive us to the ultimate deed - purposefully cutting the life God granted (and can take away) short? Diverging from His master plan. Trying to control destiny.

Life is lots of things seemingly all at once. Blessed. Unfair. Joyous. Grief-stricken. Happy. Rebellious. Pleasurable. Confusing. Fulfilling. Regretful. And a thousand emotions in-between.

But if I could offer one thing to anyone who is unsure that they should be living... is that in life we are connected. Even if we feel we are completely cut-off and all alone - there is someone out there who would be devastated if you altered the natural order of your life. Devastated, as in unable to ever reconcile the belief they could have somehow changed the outcome. Responsible. Guilty. Defeated.

Find help. Take one more breath. Pick up the phone. Look in the mirror and remember one time in your life that you made someone else smile. Laugh. Hug you. Because whether they are in heaven or still walking this earth, they would be forever devastated if you purposefully ended your life.

Please. Just. Don't.

And I love you.

Thanking Bob Sherman

I kinda can't recall how at this point, but tonight I discovered Bob Sherman's Linked In profile and his blog which I never knew existed. I'm tremendously sad that I'm too late to reconnect with him, as Bob passed in 2011.

Bob was my first "real" boss.  He and Jon Olken took a chance on hiring me for their admin back in the 1980's - I was a fresh college grad desperate to break into the advertising business.

I have so many vivid memories of working at Della Femina Sherman & Olken, which I remember fondly and with tremendous gratitude. And, truth be told, with lots of smirking and laughing at the shenanigans that were a daily part of life working for an ad agency at that special time.

Now, looking back not only am I in awe of his overall career, but so grateful to have had the opportunity to have rubbed elbows with him. I was able to get a glimpse into his amazing talent, salesmanship and advertising genius - all right alongside of his tremendous love for his family.

Sometimes, you don't realize who the most important influencers in your life are until they are no longer here to thank.  If I could see you tomorrow, I would thank you, Bob Sherman. For taking a chance on me and teaching me how to succeed. I will never forget you.

Government Shuts Down

Typically I love waking up on October 1st. It's the start of my very favorite month of the year.

But as I woke this morning, I heard the news of the Government shut-down starting today from our bedside Sony Dream Machine clock radio. (Yes, it's ancient, I'll post a pic soon).

This means a half day's work for my spouse, which when unexpected, is greeted with the same joy as a snow day when you were a kid.

But hopefully this won't turn into an protracted vacation. With two kids in college, having even one paycheck compromised is a scary thing. (And my paycheck will be going through some changes too. We'll get to that in a later post.)

For all the Federal employees who really work for a living, I sincerely hope our elected officials can get this straightened out quickly.